Friday, June 4, 2010

And so it begins...

Hello Bogging World,

After several months of wanting to start a blog and several weeks of racking my brain trying to come up with a subject that I thought would be fun for me to write about and interesting enough for people to read, my first post idea just fell into my lap.

Before I explain the event that sparked my interest to write about, I need to set up the scenario.  Two years ago when I graduated high school, I set out bright-eyed and eager to succeed at the University of Missouri (fondly referred to as Mizzou) nearly 650 miles from my home in suburban Dallas, Texas.  It is very appropriate to say that I fell in love with Mizzou at first sight knew that I had chosen the school that I needed to be at.  Over these past two years, I experienced things I never expected, especially having come to Mizzou not knowing anyone.  I joined my sorority, Phi Mu, and through it had so many opportunities to get involved, and most importantly, to meet and get to know the wonderful women who I am very proud to call my sisters.  The words "best friends" do not even being to explain the closeness I feel with these women.  They are my sisters in every sense of the word and I do not know where I would be without their love and support.  There are way too many memories and experiences to list, and I don't want to do shout-outs because you know who you are, but that Phi Mu love has been such an important part of my life and will be forever.

I have been lucky enough to meet friends and people outside of Phi Mu that I know will always be in my life, including two people I consider to be my sisters and best friends.  I fell in love with the most wonderful man in the world and we have been together for a year and a half.  He has been the biggest blessing and one of the most influential factors in my life, not to mention my best friend.  I constantly catch myself wondering how I am lucky enough to get to be with him.  We have never been stronger and I am very excitedly looking forward to our future.

I was able to be involved in wonderful events such as Phi Mu's Miracle Men and Dance Marathon, both benefiting the wonderful Children's Miracle Network, and have had numerous leadership positions and opportunities both in Phi Mu and campus-wide.

I am blessed to have had all of these opportunities and to have gotten to know so many wonderful people, but notice how I didn't say anything about academics?  I went to Mizzou with the intention of becoming a journalism major in the highest-acclaimed journalism school in the country.  In my mind, learning from the best was worth paying the expensive out-of-state tuition and taking classes I didn't enjoy and, to be honest, wasn't interested in.  By the beginning of my sophomore year, I had lost all interest in journalism.  It is expected that a college student will change their major several times before they graduate, but that wasn't an option for me because paying out of state tuition and not being a journalism major didn't go hand in hand.  I decided to stick with journalism because I didn't want to leave Mizzou and go somewhere else.  College classes ended up being much harder than I anticipated them to be, and by the end of this past school year, I was faced with a less-than-ideal situation.


After weeks, I repeat, weeks of waiting, I was informed yesterday morning that I am not able to enroll in the classes I need to take this summer in order to be admitted into the Missouri School of Journalism this coming Fall.  Classes start this coming Monday.  I found out Thursday that I would not need to pack up my bags and make the move to Columbia for the entire summer.  What if I had gotten into the classes and had needed to pack, book a very expensive flight, get a dorm room (if there were any left at this point), and move?  Thanks for the notice, J-school advisors.  Regardless of the notice I did or did not receive, I was not accepted into the classes and therefore, will not be returning to Mizzou in the fall.

I knew it could go either way, but I really thought the odds for success were on my side.  After taking a little while to throw myself a pity party, I quickly went into planning mode.  I dropped all of the classes I was enrolled in for the fall semester at Mizzou, ordered my final transcript, and scheduled my orientation at the University of North Texas for next Friday, June 11.  I'm a little surprised with myself.  I usually like to dwell on things for far too long and tear myself down as much as possible until I feel absolutely terrible before I start to see the good in a situation.  Maybe this all hasn't hit me yet.  Maybe it won't hit me until I am driving the 30 minutes to go to Denton when school starts in August rather than making the much longer journey back to Columbia for work week and recruitment with my sisters, but at least I'm not "floating" anymore and can start planning for my future.

I'm sad and scared to death about having to start all over as a junior in college.  I want to be mad and want to wake up from this dream that I must be having, but after thinking everything over, I had an epiphany.  Everything I listed above had nothing to do with Mizzou and is nothing that leaving Mizzou will cause me to lose.  Transferring will make things more inconvenient, sure, but I firmly believe that friends and the people you have relationships with are just as responsible for the relationship as you are.  I am not worried about keeping in touch with the amazing people who have become such a big part of my life.  Expect many visits from me in the future. :]

I have much more to say about all of this, but I think this post is long enough.  I want to use this blog as not only a way to keep in touch with people, but as a way to transition to this new chapter in my life.  I hope you will all follow along and share it with me.

More to come,


Katie said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Brittany said...

I'm so proud of you for not dwelling on the negative and making the decision that's best for you. Are you still planning on majoring in English to do editing/publishing as we talked about?

I'm also probably going to start a blog to keep in touch from Montana- we can be blog buddies & commisserate about missing Mizzou! :( But as you said, we can keep in touch despite distance! It will be exciting to start new chapters in our lives :)

Love you!

bappqd said...

Look at you go. You truly are a journalist whether you believe it or are not sure. You have a beautiful language with words and it's as though you are a columnist and not a student.

I miss you too much to even describe. I hope you and Tom stay strong and that you come to visit. Don't worry about us, you keep on planning. No offense, Sara, but you do dwell and you also get confused a lot but in this blog you just wrote, you proved to us and yourself that change can be a good thing if you make the most of it. I love you and hope you keep updating on your blog. Tell us how your trip went! :)

Miss you/ LIOB, Passini

Sara said...

Sorry, Katie! I accidentally deleted your comment. :[

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